Ebony and Ivory Live Together in Perfect Harmony

As I sit next to the pseudo-Judo Law, we come on to the age-old question of "what's with these skets?!" Not my words - It was Long-Johns, but we shall cover this crucial question in a later blog, if I remember. So, as the conversation progressed, we went on to another brother's (what he would call) predicament, which was "why do all black women love me?" A deep discussion ensues...

Starting with the latter question, we decided to go through all the possible "desirable characteristics, virtues and charms...and qualities, and attributes, and not forgetting skills," of his being that makes my humble house mate so "irresistible" attractive to the ebony:

• His love of cheese. In fact some may call him a connoisseur.
• Speaks in received pronunciation.
• When making a racist remark, he would then follow up with the words "But my best friend is [insert ethnicity]!" (Okay, I made that one up)
• Originates from Cambridge
• His innocence (apparently)
• The use of the term "Post-coitus discussion"
• His favourite Tupac song is 'Changes' or 'Ghetto Gospel' (he can't decide between the two)
• Owns a hip-flask
• He keeps calm
• He carries on

The list goes on, however it is too long for me to bother to think of anymore stereotypically British traits.

Anyway, the lads and I agreed to the fact that Sir Blue Esq. shouldn't look at his situation as an oppourtunity to boost his ego, instead we all signed upon the doctrine that "with great power, comes great responsibility." And with that, our advice to Sir Blue Esq. was for him to find a lady and settle down! Damn.

  "Don't wanna be a player no more, I think I found someone I could live my life for..."
                                            - Joe Thomas - Don't wanna be a player

Deuces.